Hey I found your number in my phone i dont remember how we met this is richard btw
strange i dont have your number must have been a drunk thing
could be more
absolutely not
I don't care if he is my ex... I have the deed to his dick until someone else fucks him. We broke up 2 years ago.... I am still holding that deed!
I thought she was mad at me, but then we did a pose off and I realized we're friends for life
okay so using the row boat as a giant snow sled probably wasn't the best idea.
We watched 'the mighty ducks' last night and took shots every time someone quacked. I woke up this morning wearing a nothing but a hockey jersey laying next to him on the floor. He was wearing a goalie mask. I really wish I knew what happened.
I can't, I'm busy. I've been walking around Tokyo on google maps for an hour.
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
Thank you for the breast cancer awareness themed circle of death. Had it been any other time I would not have played topless.
The coffee from our coffee maker just hasn't tasted normal since we made Mac n cheese in it that one time....
I just want to let it be known that I almost put my phone in the fridge.
I mean I'm not gay but a hundred bucks is a hundred bucks
I vaguely remember us chasing shots by licking each other's faces last night. Our friendship has reached another level completely.
He texts me "just to say hi" and then tells me how hard he is and sends me a dick pic. And I'm like, dude, I'm ordering a burrito right now
I'm laying in bed cuddling with my teddy bear and eating waffles. I need a fucking boyfriend
He told me that he had never gotten a blow job. I sat there for a second, then thought "I MUST FIX THIS!" It was fucking fantastic.
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