is it bad that i shorted Freddie Mac immediatly after I heard about the CFO?
Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
SHE has hooked up with both me and my sister. I don't even know what to say. If she goes for my parents next I may have to kill her
She gained 35 lbs and has an ankle bracelet, time for new booty call.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You did this to me with your delicious pizza and moonshine.
I'll forgive you once we're drunk again by noon.
Dear awkwardly drunk roommate, thanks for stuffing enough change in my clevage that I could afford a pepsi at work today. Sincerely awesome roommate that put up with your drunk ass
I'm starting to question if I'm gonna need to bring a raincoat just to drink around u
U act like I can cum on command
I'm not taking advice from anyone I've seen passed out naked at noon on the hood of a strangers car. Meaning you.
I partied with a deaf mute last night. strangely enough the more drunk I get the easier it is to understand him.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The medical term is prolapsed anal walls if you want to look into it with dignity.
On my way to return shoes I bought so that I can afford to buy a pregnancy test. Is this adulthood?
Fuck you. All I remember from last night is telling random people that I'm in a "judgement free zone" then I threw up
I hooked up with a sophomore, passed out at midnight, and apparently drunkenly peed on Nicole's wedding invitation
I ate at the cafeteria for the first time yesterday and today I think I had an hour long fart.
She’s a Vegas 8, which makes her an Oklahoma 27
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