he just said he'd buy the porn
its a step up from the last guy
After I talked about my ex for about twenty minutes, she just listened, sluts are so understanding
just found out my sister was breast fed and i was not...pretty upset about that.
i was more sad about losing him as neighbor on fishville than as a boyfriend
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This is my last and worst hangover of the decade...I almost cherrish it
currently hungover, lying in bed and cutting cheese with my drivers license. ashamed? not even a little bit.
Say something like you want him to fuck you behind a McDonald's. Guys secretly love weird shit like that.
OMG OMG OMG DID YOU KNOW THERE ARE MINI CHOCOLATE COWBOY HATS THAT MEN CAN BUY FOR THEIR PENISES?
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
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My therapist keeps stopping to ask what 'hooking up' means
ITS ORAL SEX CAROL
I have to confess something, I may or may not have knocked on your window at 2:30 am while balancing on some guys hands. We found tequila.
Yeah. That's the shitty part. God, I don't want to be a step mom. Sure I'm great with kids, but I just want unlimited sex and not have to worry about making friends with a fucking 7 year old.
Just give me 5 advils and some sunglasses and I'll knock out on this couch no problem.
Let us rub each other in fish scales and become mermaids
Now with the essential back story, I can empathize. Sorry about your beer and butthole.
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