so i did it. i barked while i was ejaculating. not a word was said by either of us afterwards.
so how much did i say i owed you?
$5 and a new fuck buddy.
She kept screaming "yeah! You pick up my books!" the whole time. . .
So recap time do u remember biting that girls hand?
I guess since this is supposed to be my year of the lesbian it's okay
Yeah but I get laid and I know. He drank toilet water last night and he doesn't know about that either. Still makes me happy though.
I only feel half bad for cheating on him because while we were fucking I was given great relationship advice and now I'm ready to work some things out.
hotdog in my bra and i still managed to score. Got a bit freaked when he tried to eat it though. I paid 3 bucks for that fucking hotdog.
I wanted to be mature but the vodka was resilient.
At what part of the night did you guys leave?
After my hot tub cannonball.
Cant leave im designed bacon maker you come here
Being pregnant feels like you have a hangover everyday.. Don't listen to what anyone says about how wonderful it is
My roommate randomally bought me two bags of pretzels. Worst "Sorry you can hear me fucking my boyfriend everynight" gift ever.
Topless, eating sour gummies, doing a crossword, at 4 AM. TELL ME IM BEAUTIFUL!
Almost gave the delivery guy a 34 dollar tip. That high
100000% expect a picture of my ass in them
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