honey bunches of taint.
i seriously just saw a stripper from last weekend walk into the classroom next to me!!
I've never had a woman show me her venereal disease results in a bar before.
On the bright side I still get a $20 referral bonus at the plasma center even though he passed out during donation because he was so high.
I apparently spent $173 at the bar last night. The proof is in the vomit on my pillow and the receipt I tried to clean it up with.
i found him! he's on the front porch using a bag of potting soil as a pillow. i forgot i left him there.
I can hear her moaning. I'm on some random guy's counter. He wanted me to cuddle but I said I didn't know how.
I shouldn't be home alone with this much peanut butter and the dog. I feel like i'm being recorded to see when my desperation will peak.
He gave me a hug and said "He doesn't deserve you, Anna. Your boobs are great, and I'd fuck you anytime. Any. Place." I need a new 'gay' friend.
Why did I wake up with condoms on all my fingers?
Considering the girl you hooked up with, I'd be concerned about not having one on your penis.
I don't understand why you aren't on this trip all I do is smoke weed drink beer and get fingered
Does your body have a liquid mass index? does that make sense? I think I drank it in Long islands.. Kill me now..
I mean jail does seem alright, all the free broth you can eat.
He even wore it to bed. What the hell. He's too excited about that goddamn costume.
Well, I wish you luck on finding out who your boyfriend is
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