There is something just so refreshing and wonderful about an uninterrupted morning poop in the office.
If it looks like I didn't change from last night, it's because I didn't.
he said he wanted to butter my pancake. i thought it was sexual, but he went downstairs and made pancakes. i need to stop dating fat guys.
The guy I fucked last night is well worth up the ass tuition. I just wish I could tell dad thanks!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
I am getting drunk. And i'm going to paint my face and slide down the stairs like Pochahontas. Goodbye
bad news.. campus security walked me home last night and when i tried to tell them where i lived they assured me they knew where our house was.
Imagine getting a FB inbox "hey I found your ID on the floor of a bar can you send me a mugshot so I can get a second piece of ID made?"
i found out she really is a mensa member
so she was the smartest passed out on the floor hair encrusted in vomit girl at the party
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's under the table sobbing because he doesn't live in a taco if you ever get him this high again I will stab you
I just can't even fathom the crazy and I work at a mental hospital.
you bleached my bangs. i have an interview later today and you assholes bleached my bangs.
OH MY GOD MY UBER DRIVER IS PEEING BEHIND A DUMPSTER
Still got in the car though
so i just met a former male stripper who has a lion king tattoo. new BFF? i think yes
Can you get an STD by sharing underwear? Walk of shamed home and realized I was wearing someone else’s panties
No one knows. This doesn’t happen to normal people.
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