I tried to give up sex for lent. It feels weird that on easter I'm this excited to be a whore again
I know right? mind you this is the same woman who told me when I was 12 that oral sex just meant talking dirty
He woke up, mumbled "silverware", and went back to sleep
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
Then, he just started shoving orange pieces in my mouth as a chaser
Totalylr drunk. Coveredc in cryola marker. Loving it. Straight men everywhere. Don't be surprises when I'm pregbat romorrowwwww
Please find an outlet that isn't stripping or getting drunk and arrested
juast therw a cheeeeesestirng over the fnce. stuckit to sombodys car winheild... gonna luagh if i find it mlted in the mrning.
i have a feeling i am the only one who can successfully pull off the "slutty kentucky derby" look.
My radar detector detects ice cream trucks. I think it was made for stoners
I'd be careful with that one, she got 86'd from the family dollar while SOBER.
But in the grand scheme of things, "should i bang a hot roommate or a sexy giant" is really not a bad lot in life
Bouncer came into the bathrooms to tell us the old one-person-per-stall rule, realised it was two girls banging, and left us to it. Lesbiperks.
I don't know where I keep finding these guys, but mi power bottoms es su power bottoms.
When the theology professor asked me what touched me most about this trip to Rome, I guess "the guy from last night" wasn't the proper response.