Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
The worst thing about having a parent with a prius is that they can walk in on you without any warning
He locked about 20 beers in a suitcase and put it in the fridge. For a complete idiot, he's a goddamn genius.
Do you think most people who work at an airport Chili's can pin point where their lives went wrong?
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
He said he's was gunna give me some pain meds. I'm not sure what they are but I just gave him a thumbs up
You tried to convince our cab driver that your $2 bill was worth $11.70
bad decision 37: pregaming the antique store
I think I just cured my dogs munchies
YOU DON'T JUST GET TO CALL AND SAY YOU MIGHT BE DEAD, THEN NOT ANSWER!
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
Yeah. Moral of the story: Don't mace yourself. It sucks dick.
Omg last night I was giving shots out like I was the Willy Wonka of the alcohol world.
I've been back for one day and I've already given two bjs. Improvement from last year.
There's a burrito next to my bed. Did you buy it for me or is the Chipotle fairy real? And why am I naked?
Currently doing the walk of shame out of some random girls house with my boyfriend. Talk about relationship goals.
Haha i really think theres no better way to tell a paramedic sorry for breaking your nose than a beautiful and healthy edible arrangement...