That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
Dude she has a bf and shes on lockdown more than Nelson Mandela in 95
At this point I feel like i'm never going to be sober, and it's frightening
I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE.
thank you for letting me use your house as a brothel.
I'm giving great sideboob & it's being wasted on my parents.
nothing like a call from your drunk grandpa at midnight on a wednesday to ask your parents if you're registered to vote...
But I'm a half a mile from my bed. And I have the hiccups. I hate hiccups.
strip vodka pong is never a good idea. I saw into his colon when he picked up the ball off the floor
You are the only person I know who has a fierce hatred for a five year old. Not even five year olds in general, yours is very specific
Changed all my ex bf's names to "no" in my phone so the next time I try to drunk text one of them it'll basically be like Russian roulette
Apparently I'm some kind of sexual camel.
Sorry I had sex in your backseat while everyone was in the car
It's quite alright. I found his shorts in my backseat, not sure what he was wearing when we dropped him off
i woke up half naked on someone's pool lounge chair in a house that i don't know, with someone's phone number scrawled on my stomach. why do i hang out with you again??
You just listed two reasons.
Omg dude take a shower. You'll feel like god washed away all the sinful shit we did last night.
Randomize
