i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
There's a girl n class drinking wine out of a taco bell cup. I can smell it.. it's totally reisling. JEALOUS.
not exactly restoring sanity, but he is throwing up on the national mall right now
We're sitting in his room writing songs about America. There's a verse about a dead dog. There's tequila everywhere.
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Hm, finding a time when my drinking and your real life don't conflict could be difficult
RA chick in a Christmas onsie chased us up 5 flights of stairs. I need to stop violating guest policy
Saved a life and got us a free vacuum cleaner (and learned vacuum is not spelled "vacumn"). Get on my level.
After you threw up you would repeatedly say "napkin" like a siren until somebody got you a fucking napkin.
You don't understand!!! BACON ROSES!!! Why are you not more excited?!
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What alcohol should i drink Saturday to completely hate life?
he's really high and upset. he just found out alice from the brady bunch died
He looks like a Mormon from a lifetime movie. Oddly I wanna give him a hand job
I think he fucked my hip out of place.
I'm not having sex with him if he doesn't believe in gay marriage and abortions.
I’ll call you in a minute. Trying to book an AirBnB so I can finally bang the yummy guy from yoga
Your downward dog is going to rock his cock. I’m jealous
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