all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
Oh btw, that was a wonderful blow job. You did a good job.
I'm glad we're going to catch up. too bad it's over my vagina.
Dunno yet. Probably just gonna play the s.t.d. russian roulette game with random bartenders at the beach again. Same 'ol same 'ol
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm sorry. I just realized our 'big night out' ended up being you driving my high ass to get burritos and back.
There's cereal in my underwear. Was I in your apartment at any time last night? That's the only logical explanation for this.
I've spent all afternoon taking and editing selfies. The life of a bimbo is truly tiring.
....she made me stop for like 3 minutes so she could talk to her cat....
Reports of my death were greatly exaggerated.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
High-fiving last weekend's hook up in passing on the way to class has given me quite the lady boner.
i need to stop meeting underage girls and letting them into the bar. i mean yea its a surefire way to get laid without having to tell them I'm 26 but i feel like as a bouncer I'm focusing on all the wrong things
I'll screw just about anything, but I draw the line there
i was too drunk before they even got here. i took all their phones instead of keys and hid them in the freezerr...im an awesome party host.
just ran into my father at CVS while buying condoms...he winked at me. I really need to move out of this town.
He kept saying "Ayyyyyyy" during foreplay... during sex.... during everything! It felt like I was having sex with friggin Fonzie from Happy Days!
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