It has come to my attention that I should apologize for myself and my friends
"Morning after" poops are always like, interesting.
I told him I was prego. He asked coul we do it without a condom now since I cldn't get any pregnanter. What an a-hole.
Biggest lesson I have learned in college: Drink if you are happy. Drink more if you aren't.
These 33 Eskimo Brothers Boinked The Same Person And Couldn’t Be More Proud
This is part your fault too. Don't tell me your dishes are unbreakable and not expect me to prove you wrong.
The waitress just told me I'm asking alot. So far I've asked for a soul, an angel and carbombs
bro, your right, i shouldn't feel embarrassed about taking shots from a penis-shaped ice sculpture
next time im at a party and go to fist bump the dude who took my virginity two years ago PLEASE STOP ME
I feel like there's no sexy way to pull 12 condoms out of your bra.
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
WHAT GOOD IS APPRECIATING IF NOBODY'S NAKED
Is it bad that I've been making new friends through your vagina networking? I don't think so
Jesus, I think this onesie was designed to keep me from masturbating.
Some girl woke me up at 1:30 am looking for weed and the next thing I know I'm in a hot tub with 3 girls, 2 40's, and a blunt.
there are not enough nopes in the world for that situation.
the sex was good. her showing me pictures of her 4 year old daughter afterwards was not.