Goal for tonight: Make one last drunken mistake for the semester.
seagrams + popov + pineapple + milk. there, ur search for worlds worst drink is over. you're welcome
When I'm drunk and can't pee, I sing my abc's in my head and try to pee before I get to pee. Last night I forgot to do it in my head
but instead of smelling like hand cream and homemade cookies, she smells like a yeast infection.
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part of it is the fact that im problem drinking, and the other part is my OCD wont let me leave the bottle half-empty.
I fatbooth all their pics then decide which one is the cutest even if they gained like 400 lbs and then proceed to fuck him.
I thought making out with his sister would be a great way of meeting him. But it backfired.
after further investigation i found out he's a little bit married..
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
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Is it possibile to sprain your taint?
She was that bad?
My garbage can has nothing in it besides condoms and candy wrappers. That's good garbage.
He got too drunk... he threw up ON the closed toilet.
It's a Jersey thing
No. DON'T DO IT. Friends don't let friends fuck clowns.
It's not even 8:30a, wine glass is broken, there's sugar everywhere, and your mom just asked me what MILF means.
Not sure how my purse ended up in the bushes last night... Or why there was a noodle strainer in the toilet.