It just feels so wrong throwing away the condoms into her Hello Kitty trashcan
How am I still drunk? Whoever said breakfast is the most important meal obviously didn't skip dinner and go drinking.
You said you wanted to go to louisiana and get arrested by Steven segal
I mean come on, he's the best quarterback in the state and doesn't even know how to put on condom
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
if you wouldnt have been fucking me hard and crazy like that then my bed wouldn't have broke. you owe me 600.
so you admit it was good then??
Yeah, I just met her and we got arrested together. I think it was a good bonding experience.
Hey bro, did you ever hear from the background investigator that i was supposed to bang?
Look dude, you cant keep blaming everything on the new years party. Its february...
She tried to escape and she fell and hit the door. She's gunna freak when she wakes up with only half a tooth.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
when your 30 and im 37 and we're lonely and single, lets make a pact to murder each other.
Now some guy that's in my phone as " Alex lip ring hot" is texting me and I don't where life is taking me
WOKE UP NEXT TO A PLATE OF MEATBALLS HAPPY MONDAY
sexting while watching Peter Pan the Musical! something just doesn't seem right here
In my defense I didn't know there was concrete on the other side of that fence when I tossed him over it.
You're both fucking idiots and this is why I should never let you two drink alone.
There's lube on my homework. #priorities
Randomize