Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
yeah...it smells like an asshole would smell if someone ate sewage.
I know i'm drunk when the "men" sign on the bathroom sounds chinese
you were drinking a pitcher of what you called "16 loko" and making everybody guess what the secret ingredient was
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I could get a dump truck for 1000. Think of the possibilities.
he just used "boss" and "boner" in the same sentence. I cant respond.
I saw you eating fruit and doing shots off people passed out
Who ate shrimp cocktail in my bathroom last night?
I don't feel bad about fucking old guys. That's what I want. It's what I likeeeeee.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told the American that we should start banging in Canada incase I get hurt and have to go to the hospital.. is that rude to say?
Stop leaving buckets of wine at my house.
He literally ejaculated and I hit Uber
Fun fact: You might be drunk if your vision is so blurry that you almost ask "do you know where my glasses are?" while you're wearing them.
Dude, he came to our house with a beer can in his hand dressed up in a chicken suit screaming, "free eggs!" then threw up and passed out in the front yard.
My boss's toddler just went through my bag and found your vibrator...you owe me a drink.
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