You made me cry and you don't even care
I woke up this morning and I couldn't find my coffeetable. wtf?
i'm so desperate for a drink right now i looked up the recipe to make pruno
Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just made Jack Daniels snow cones.
i've never seen someone face fit so perfectly in a toilet bowl
what's with the bloody hand print on the hood of your car
My boss just sent an employee on an hour long paid break to pick up weed for our 'staff meeting' tomorrow morning.
Just so you know, my new pet parrot tried to bond sexually with me today. That is what Google told me. I'm not sure of its gender.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
Also. When I die, I'm gonna have them put me in the casket naked and then have an open casket funeral. That will be my last chance to make people uncomfortable.
Pretty sure i brought my phone charger to a booty call
I think when Jesus turned water into wine it was a sign that we should get drunk off Sangria tonight. Do it for Jesus. He died for your sins.
My actions are not mine. They are the actions of Patron.
Im wearing black today mourning the orgasm i couldn't get this morning :(
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