Just saw cops pull over the ice cream truck. What a dick
i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
He showed me a four inch blond hair that grows out of his side. He calls it his little ray of sunshine. Please come get me.
we're doing beer bongs from the windmill...epic
Women Are Tweeting Photos Of Their Underwear To Support Rape Victim Whose Thong Was Cited During Trial
Great News, you CAN smoke bowls with a magnifying glass
Played "Which Couple Will Take Me Home Tonight" at the bar last night... I can now cross three-some off my bucket list
Kegger tonight. 10pm. $5 coverfor unlimited booze. Proceeds benefit nuns from Uganda. Bring friends. No shit.
You scratched my dick last night. It deserves an apology and I fell that actions speak louder than words when it comes to apologies like this.
We're bowling witha frozen turkey in the hallway...ur missing out
21 ‘Don’t Say It’ Tweets That Are Gonna Get Said Every Damn Time
Jsyk, in serious talks of trading blowjobs for soup in bed. I'm sober
The only thing I remember from last night is being naked in his bed if that's not summer drinking at it's finest then I don't wanna live anymore
Woke up with a 6lb bucket of Redvines with a note that said "I'm sorry" care to explain?
I just want to nap and funnel a bottle of wine in a cute dress
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
I have only made 3 good decisions in my life and getting really stoned reenacting the Lion King with my cat in a lion mane hat is 2 of them.