real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
Does slim fast make a chocolate heart for valentines? If so that's what she's getting.
There are going to be so many Snookis this Halloween that I might just dress as the guy that hit her and punch them all in the face
My last memory involves me naked in a mens's bathroom stall. I really hope my date was with me.
You said you were going to take the sideview mirror to your own car so that nobody would steal it. Thats why you woke up with it.
Sorry, but you probably shouldn't come over. I'm too sober for this.
I found your pet lobster in the bathroom this morning. I went to return it to you but it escaped.
This conversation has now reached a level of awkward that even a passerby streaking hobo couldn't break.
there's a girl on facebook trying to buy me a pizza. I can't say no... right?
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
We watched X-Files, ate pizza, and he played with my butt. It was a pretty standard Monday.
I offer naked tickle fights and orgasms and you call it trouble. I call that Christmas.
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
Only I could dislocate my ribcage coaching volleyball and still want to get drunk tonight.
Randomize
