It's not true, it's not true! She's too full of cheese to have sexy time!
I was high enough to think that mac-n-cheese w/ ketchup, tortilla chips w/ ketchup, and milk was a fancy dinner
He said my breasts were God's way of making up to him for all the shit he's had to endure in his life.
Dude they are all farmers and I'm pretty sure there's a prostitute here.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Another Sunday, another 100 chicken nuggets
In honor of the internet blackout, I think everyone needs to change their Facebook pictures to ones of them being blacked out.
I went to look at my notes for my take home final and all I had written was 'you're on E. You won't remember a damn thing anyway.'
Sex in the corn maze.....not as good as advertised.
They ran out of toilet paper, so I had a girl rip down the streamers so I could wipe.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We watched scrubs, then I got a shower blowjob which led to shower sex and the living room floor sex. Now she's baking cookies. I may not be studying, but I'm doing something right.
Out of everyone here, the sober one caught the cat on fire.
Your mother may get texts again about women putting dog food up their vaginas and asking for it to be licked.
I feel like you're the reason public nudity is illegal and generally frowned upon in society
Not sure if I should ask if I can have my underwear back or just avoid that all together.
Btw I definitely had pizza sauce on my face, a painful hickey on my neck, and I just remember screaming SISTER WIVES because of the girl's 1997 jean skirt! Wow.
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