This got awkward about two "Oh yeah"s ago.
It was like a little tadpole swimming in the big ocean.
I just had one of those moments where i was really sad that i'll never get to be asian.
His whole family saw that I had cum in my hair once they turned on the blacklight at the bowling alley. You should have seen his mother's face.
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at the hospital. he locked himself in the kitchen, said he was making beer batter shrimp. don't know if it's the mercury poisoning, alcohol poisoning or second degree burns they're holding him for, but i've got a pretty guess.
I made a bet with her that she would show me her tits if I finished my beer. Only on spring break.
yolo... Doesn't that stand for 'shut the fuck up'?
I just explained it as we hate everyone in the world more then we hate each other. Thus making us friends. Plus we drink...a lot
I think drinking is the foundation of our friendship
Hey guy that stepped on my foot, don't slap my ass to apologize.
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Whoever labeled dysfunctional a bad thing obviously never saw this frinedship coming.
took shots off of a myriad of fake boobs last night. It was glorious.
The first thing I did when I got to the apartment was masturbate on the couch
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
I knew how high you were when you put a french fry in your mouth and said 'fuck, this tastes like meat but feels blue.'
I just want this to serve as a reminder in the morning that the topic of conversation at last call was the penis size of jesus.
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