Maybe i shouldn't have told him the key to getting in my pants was double vodka sodas and Nelly's song "grillz."
I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
As I was puking last night I told them "it's ok I'm a paramedic"
Satisfying Perfect Camera Moments
Thanks for putting the blue stuff in the toilet, it made me throwing up this morning more enjoyable.
No idea how he made them, but vodka water balloons were a horrible idea.
Just saw a cougar do the walk of shame. She asked housekeeping where the fastest elevator was.
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
My way of showing team usa support, bronze: handy silver: bj gold: home run. God, I'm patriotic
This Dog Travel Carrier is a Must
FYI your bra is now hanging in the hallway as a trophy.
facebook is just a cold reminder of all the times other bitches won my hookups
I don't work there anymore. If they had Prince themed dildo parties i never would have quit
Is a coke binge Whole30 approved?
i can't hookup with him because someone else bit my vagina
Sexting my TA in lecture = awesome