I just egged your windshield and it froze on contact. Have fun with that.
i just heard Winston Churchill in auto-tune. thank you nerds.
Does slim fast make a chocolate heart for valentines? If so that's what she's getting.
We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just got cockblocked by a guy drinking wine straight out of the bottle with a straw...
Im about to have a threesome, Ill pay you twenty bucks to go clean my room. Just throw it all in the closet.
Wait wait wait. I remember riding in her car to the next bar. On your lap. With my head on the dashboard. That probably should have been my cut off point.
I'm having horrible flashbacks of being groped by Pauly Shore.
Oh god the guy I took underwear from at the bar is trying to add me as a friend on facebook now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Teasing with taco bell is not funny. High or sober.
Please be advised that because of last year's "incident" we will no be starting St. Pat's day with spicy breakfast burritos and car bombs. Please plan accordingly.
It's gonna be one of those someone is getting divorced parties
Hooked up with a guy solely because he had a chameleon. Priorities.
She's impossible to please. Other than with two fingers and a tongue.
did I ever tell you about my gay jesus theory?
Randomize