Awkward is getting caught beating off in the company bathroom...
It was like his mom forgot to breastfeed him and he was making up for lost time.
having sex with him was like banging macgyver. he did the most amazing shit with the simplest things
my Econ professor just passed around his phone for us to take a pic of ourselves so he could learn our names. I am currently looking him up on my sex offenders app.
19 Characteristics That Make People Instantly Attractive
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
I have only been in this city 3 nights and there are already 4 bars I can never go back to again.
He legit asked if he could come over for a hug. I feel like I've been booty called by a 12 year old.
Piñatas plus fireworks don't mix well
My roommate definitely just walked in on me playing the piano naked.
By piano you mean.....
Like literally a piano.
Ohhhh that's kind of embarrassing.
25 People Confess What Theyâ€™re Shamefully Attracted To
Dude you're fine. You're 5 minutes away from your house and you're eating fig newtons
I dunno, there's just something so\ncomforting about having his penis in my mouth.
Indeed. If boner pill commercials have taught us anything, it's the importance of waiting until the moment is right.
Where else would I get life advice?
Every time you mention the threesome around him I will high five you. Do what you will with this information.
You are free to stop by. I promise to keep my penis in my leather pants
I had to reschedule my trainer meeting so now I'm just here eating hot pockets