somehow, due in part to drug cocktail and alchl prior to meeting, i blacked out, got home, made total mess of kitchen, broke shower, and made 17 hard boiled eggs
I woke up fully clothed on top of my sheets and i didnt even pee myself..so proud.
We George Forman grilled some girls phone last night.
Somewhere in this world my second husband is in 9th grade.
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His shirt was in the kitchen sink this morning, I'm pretty sure my roommates know.
He just went up to bed, still drunk from last night, carrying a pear, a pipe, and an unopened bottle of wine. I think he'll be fine.
He kept insisting that I was going to have an orgasm but it just felt like he was rubbing sand paper on my vagina
having someone tell me to "prepare my vagina" is not really something I want to hear..
Everyone threw up but him. I took off my shirt because I puked on it. There were also a lot of drag queens involved.
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I woke up and the only 2 bowls I own were shattered on my floor. Pretty sure my hand and tailbone are broken and I have no idea what the fuck happened
it's just not right when you're boyfriend has a nicer ass than you do.
blue gatorade loses no color upon regurgitation
I WANT TO JUMP IN TO A VOLCANO
Fucked him in a graveyard. Need plan b.
Okay well for one he didn't speak any english but before any happened he made me use the translator to consent
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