I'm convinced her vagina is similar to chernobyl, but I want to visit it for the novelty value anyway.
how do you wash the taste of whore out of your mouth?
He's like the houdini of condoms. I never even realized he put one on before we fucked. he's magical.
Did you ask last night's taxi driver about his penis hygiene?
My life is a requiem composed in the key of fuck.
Let me just inform you of my purse contents right now. Three cum rags, a sock full of cum, xanax, and a fake moustache. This is my life.
Sorry about blasting sandstorm on a loop when i left for work this morning. But maybe this will teach you to not come home trashed on a tuesday night with some chick and have loud sex till 4 in the morning. The walls are thin, remember?
Just saw the guy with the plastic bag on his head riding his bike again...
They just kept handing me shots and saying welcome to college
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
she has that "i will punish you like your mom did" vibe, i think guys like that.
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
We're both fucking guys named Frank. Our friendship was meant to be.
So I got a text from him saying "jacking off...thinking of you" I think I'm going to get a restraining order
It's very finicky. Like baking. or BDSM.
Randomize
