She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
If he comes back to you and I'm left alone in lonelytown I'm totally going to poo on your car.
i'm sorry for cheering you on when you were making out with him. i was just celebrating the fact he was decent looking for once
Be careful there's warming lubricant on the floor. I will clean and explain later.
My god. We'll be gay porn millionaires.
I'm not wearing underwear, I started my period this morning, and it's super windy. Recipe for disaster?
I'm sorry for the texts and anything that I said that may have caused confusion, pain or irritation. I shall not be drinking again. Furthermore I will not be keeping a phone on me should I fail to adhere to the prior statement.
This is what happens when you live with someone you met on Grindr
Seriously-without actually meaning the statement for it's words- that made me want to put a baby in you.
I DON'T EVEN KNOW ONE MINUTE IM SITTING HER THE NEXT IM FLYING PASSED THE MOON
PISSING MYSELF IN ZERO GRAVITY
THOSE AIN'T STARS U SEE TONIGHT GURL
It was fine until they started lighting shots of everclear on fire and making ME take them. That's when shit went down...
I'm missing my left shoe, and there's a note on my foot (in my handwriting) that says "HAHA BITCH" Any explanation for this?
Why are we so great
Like I'm def going to a therapist but I wouldn't change a thing about us except maybe the peeing
He compared my ass to "a 13 year old track star's ass." Umm WTF? Is that supposed to be a compliment? And when I questioned boy or girl he said "either."
Me and my liver are not on speaking terms.