if you dont talk to me in person you cant text me
I just had one of those nervous system things in my thumb...I'm pretty sure I have cancer.
My parents just checked my browsing history and now think I'm addicted to porn and am a necrophiliac. 1: I know it was you. 2: You're so dumped, that shit is sick.
would you kill someone to have someone deliver pancakes to you when you were high?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The working title of my paper? "Tailgating: A Big Clusterfuck of Kids Who Dont Actually Give a Shit about Football"
I'm that hungover student in class ... On a wednesday morning
Omg I think I'm in the wrong class
You need to stop having girl talk with the guys I'm sleeping with.
Fell twice in five points. on my face. literally during a cross walk. The cars just went around me. 21st birthday memories right there
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
IM GOING TO SIT ON YOUR FACE AND CHANT 'I BELIEVE THAT WE WILL WIN'
Because my vagina is Ellis Island. All foreign penises must be presented for inspection and competency. God bless America.
I think the best course of action at this point is to cut his balls off to get him to stop reproducing
I feel like everything in my life has been preparing me for my future sex robot experience
You’re so close!!!
I fought off a bull with my bare hands while he went off to have sex with her against a wall. I’m more upset about the fact that no one is acknowledging what I did.
The weekend was a blur. There was vodka and penises and orgasms. I played a game of Cock Roulette and won big
Randomize