I thought she was going to get passionate and throw her on the bed and fuck her, but she just started breaking stuff.
That's the thing about women.
and next time when you feel me up, do it right
can i drink enough to forget this semester even happened?
How do you get eyebrow wax out of your butthole region?
The fact that you aren't ashamed to ask that is the reason I will give you the answer. Under the sink there is a bottle of wax remover. Throw my waxing kit away as well.
The 19 Strangest Things People Use To Get Off
New plan: we get a little bit drunk and go to 24 hour fitness and be eachothers wing people so we can hit on in shape hot people at a gym instead of drunk idiots at a bar.
just woke up to find an unpeeled banana, with a condom on, halfway into my vagina. this better not be you trying to be funny
But life isn't just all about getting drunk & eating chicken strips.
well, the drug dealer I've been fucking the past 5 months gave me a chilis gift card for Christmas, so things are looking up.
Christ, I really took the slutcake last night.
Wait. Someome brought slutcake?
These 25 Normal Couples Tried Porn Moves During Sex And It Ended Horribly
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
A cute girl just told me she forgot to take her birth control and winked... I've never been so conflicted about fleeing in terror
I just got into the cab. It smells like weed and the driver looks like someone who may or may not be really talented at playing the saxophone. He also asked me my thoughts on porn when I told him I'm an actor. I might not make it home.
Dude I thought she was trying to turn my dick inside out
Didn't pick classes because we were out all weekend...only open course is "alcohol and drug problems". Fucking ironic.
I need to just embrace dildos and cats and call it a life.