"you've got the devil in yuh. the curse of Jesus is coming on your sex soon." That's what a homeless guy just told me.
Sam Adams makes it so easy to keep track of the seasons.
and she said "My body is an orphanage, I take everybody in"...
That bus ride was like a tour of all the bushes I puked behind last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I took a picture of his ID so i could remember how to spell his last name and facebook stalk him later...I think he saw me do it
Miss Michigan hasn't even been Miss USA for 24hrs and already stripper pole pics are surfacing. Classy.
There's a sign at Bashas for 30% off of 6 bottles of wine in Friday. That seems like a personal challenge.
If you do wifi you would be helping my penis out & real friends care about their friends penises...
I picked up a chick last night on crutches wearing a I am boobman tshirt. I love raves.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think if wine wasn't a thing I'd give up on life.
I took the pregnancy test for shits and giggles, but neither shits nor giggles were had.
Asking me to suck on my nipples isn't going to make me less mad at you.
Watching Supernatural does more for me sexually than the physical encounters with 90% of the men in my life.
However many condoms you have, it isn't enough.
He just showed up at my house with a giant box of Trojans and a 6-pack of Yoohoo "for a special treat afterwards". I'm in love.
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