So I went out tonight...met a guy who slightly resembled my dad,huge creeper, he asked me to "hang out" so I gave him my moms number since he was more her type:)
my text book just quoted the cookie monster
Well i then put my mattress in my closet and am currently on it. This is a new one.
sometimes you just have to pull up your panties, blow a kiss to the security camera and walk out of the alley like nothing happened.
These 23 People Walked In On Someone And Saw Some Crazy Sh*t
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
I'm taking it from the chunk of pizza I just pulled out my hair that we ate pizza last night?
Yes, i finally made it. but let me tell you...i can smell myself right now in class right now, this scent is called alcoholism.
230 lb girl across the train from me is giving a dude in a kilt a handjob while he sits in her lap
She fell down no less than 4 times while we were at the club. One of which was while she was in the bathroom stall next to me.
Confessions From 23 People Who Have Been Hiding Terrible Secrets
she visited to give me a bj between clients. Social work at its finest.
The bald guy bought me a shot so I chugged it and then walked out to the middle of the dance floor and told an old woman that might be your moms twin to bend it over...We didn't end on a good note though. Dude she stepped on my vans.
How about we just have a naked taco night instead?
but I truly enjoy making out with my best friend more than my boyfriend
I am in serious pain and you're making dick jokes. I hope you wind up with crotch rot.
WHY DID I MAKE A 7 minute video of me eating crackers and cheese when I was high
Send it to me