What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
Ryan Reynolds porn could be a WMD. Have a giant TV on the front of your tank, and just drive around playing it. Everyone dies of orgasm overload.
That's it. Iraq is done. Everyone dies, game over man.
whoever threw up in my shampooo bottle is totally getting defriended on facebook.
i tried to stop you. you just kept saying your split ends needed punishment.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
that's like... drinking popov and saying its the worlds best vodka. you gotta try some others first. THERE SHOULD BE A MISS AMERICA PAGEANT. but like, mr penis. and they can do tricks and make unintelligent remarks and wear sparkly condoms.
Dude he's not responding... I'll take that as an unpleasant visit to the clinic
You made out with a guy who refers to his cock as "rafiki." Are you proud of yourself?
Just cleaned someone else's sperm off of my bedroom wall. Never throwing a house party again.
Hah I guess I sent that to like ten people, along with another one of me sitting in a bath tub eating an ice cream sandwich.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
One day we'll be rich enough to go to rehab. Until then, fuck it.
Was having the best sex dream I've had in a while and only woke up when I heard my grandma fall down the stairs.
For whatever reason, whenever she's drunk off Crown, all she wants to do is jerk me off with her feet.
I feel like too many of my sentences start of with "Hey, fuckface!"
Omg i got really stoned and used a makeup app on my grandma...well, I’m definitely not adopted
I'll be coming off of 7 days of not drinking. No horse tranqs either. I haven't been this sober since I was in the womb
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