when she started arguing that Girl Talk was in fact a DJ, i knew i could never sleep with her
Just got back from my 9:00 am class to find my roommate soaking her lifesaver gummies in vodka so she can have them for a snack in class later.
I HATE DRINKING WITH JUST GIRLS, ITS 1030 THEYRE ALL HAMMERED AND TALKING ABOUT HOW AWESOME THEIR SHOES ARE!!!!!!!
He was such a tease, he pulled out his dick, let me touch it then put it away
First drunken handjob: not successful. Second handjob, mostly sober: much better. Nightly news brought to you by me.
she named my penis "gigantor the baby arm"
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
Halloween night fail: My boob sweat from keeping my phone in my bra caused the front screen to stop working from water damage.
I would like to apologize once again for rubbing your thigh with my hands and face for a very long time last night.
I can't tell if the dead thing in the yard is a deer or the guy I slept with last night...
She was wearing some slutty variation of a toga and giving the entire bus a pep talk on why we should black out tonight...I'M IN LOVE AND I DON'T CARE WHO KNOWS IT!
This chick at the gym, just informed me I was super funny this weekend. Especially when I untied her friends bikini top after throwing up in the women's restroom. SWEET black out chronicles has another story
Is there some sort of line being crossed when your shower activities start to involve jimmy johns?
You tore a poster off a lamppost and ATE IT. That drunk.
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
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