i just made a list of the people i have slept with. is it bad that some of them are just either names of the places i met them or the color of the shirts?
i also rounded the number up for good measure. i am sure there are a few i have forgotten about.
they had a keg party to fund her abortion.
we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
my grandma was just praying before dinner, and before she could finish my gpa lifted his glass and said 'and here's to avatar!'
I wouldnt endorse that guy if he was walking in a walkathon to raise money for a disease i had
I had to drink heavily last night because I needed to forget that you told me you want to blow my dad.
I really don't think you should have 'baptized' your tattoo in vodka the same night you got it.
You asked her to play "the coma game" with you while hooking up, and then passed out in her bed. She couldn't wake you up so she slept on the floor.
Looks like I won that one
My mom has finally acknowledged my soft spot for Russians. Finally.
Abby spilt her vodka all over the train's bathroom floor
WE'RE THE ONES DRESSED UP FOR THE LARGEST DRINKING HOLIDAY IN AMERICA WHO ELSE ON THIS TRAIN IS A SUSPECT FOR THIS SMELL?!
I puked on his mom. Not my proudest moment
I think I'd rather see her get hit by a car in one of those Russian dash cam videos on YouTube.
I'm not real sure what dinosaurs sound like, but dude, she made dinosaur noises.
Omg there's puke under my pillow. Clearly I puked and tried to hide it. From myself. \n
Ahhh, the bane of our relationship.... His mediocre penis
Randomize
