But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
gotta love it when a reminder comes up on your phone and u think u forgot about a meeting or something then u read it and its only to remind me to go to the titty bar at 3
Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
I didn't even realize you were getting that drunk until bam!
is bam when I fell down the stairs or when I threw up standing at the bar?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Some guy thought i was the waitress and handed me his credit card. drinks on me.
It's like you're a magic genie of bad timing
Tell Taylor to rock on. Tell her she is so beautiful that the sun shines down on her face and shows her beauty. Tell her to live on, like Martin Luther King. He'll never die. He's living his dreams.
dude when I get home wanna help me fulfill my dream of smoking a bowl out of my saxophone?
Just remember my house smells of thick cut bacon and I have a big dick.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Woke up this morning with my period. Saw a commercial for the beginning of Shark Week. I see what you did there, Mother Nature. My pad's off to you.
Thank god crabs can't live on your head. Thank god.
And now I'm drinking leftover wine in the grad lounge because fuck my life
Life Epiphany- I need to have children so I can be the drunk grandma at family functions. Its my destiny.
It's funny that when I fall down as an adult I'm so much happier no one saw than that I'm not seriously hurt.
My boobs are literally freaking out because I've been wearing a bra for more than three hours....I need to go out more...
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