This bar receipt from last night makes no sense
You were wasted and got mad that it was too high so you subtracted 50 bucks in the tip line from the total
I wish that would've worked
enterprise is going to pick me up, im too high for this
I gave her a mint afterward. It felt like giving turndown service at Hotel BJ.
I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
There's nothing like puking in the airport on the way TO Vegas. Something tells me i pregamed a little too hard.
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
Good news. Isn't krabs. Bad news. Not sure what it is. Worse news. Encouraged not to fuck till known. Great news getting laid tonight
Called Jeff last night and told him I wanted to have sex in the airport terminal. Blackout Brooke definitely came out last night.
the liver wants what the liver wants
Love these next 4 months. Wake up from a college football hangover and get to put your hand down your pants and watch NFL football all day.
I've woke up with the same hoodie on backwards, twice this week. I think that's a record
Being able to fart in her presence and not be judged is why I pay half the rent.
We accept all of your sexual lovers, Jewish, episcopalian, atheist. Dick is dick
Dead. I am actually dead. Also, worst nightmare confirmed: throwing up in a four hundred person lecture.
so I think we need to change lawn care services...the guy woke me up by the pool while I was naked...told me he already picked up all the beer cans for us and gave me his number for the next time we party...
Randomize
