I just watched Juno. I kind of wish I was in highschool and pregnant
So why didn't Edward and the Cullens just kill Hitler?
You need to stop watching Twilight.
Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
we're chasing vodka with high fives
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i used the pictures of vaginas in your biology book to jack off.
If I come back covered in mud topless and banging on your door, please have a warm towel ready for me
there is nothing more depressing than your birth control alarm going off while you're masturbating, and realizing you've been taking pointless precautions for over a month now.
Ya I don't think I'm going anywhere, a cum towel, beer, and Vicodin was just exchanged in our white elephant present game
I went from naked with lasts nights hookup to Ihop in 6 minutes flat
I think that's a new house record
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're just a heartbreaker with a knitting problem
You threw up on his face 22 hours ago and now he's here holding your hand. I think he likes you.
Taking care of drunk people fulfills my need to be a mother
He told me that when he bends me over that chair I remind him of a bull rider. So thanks for being the ex that helps my present sex life
Do not ever chug tabasco sauce.
He’s disease free and drives a Porsche. What else does a girl need?
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