He has that cheese in a can and he's eating it. I have never seen that outside a goofy movie.
Drunk wheelbarrow races might make the top 10 list of dumb shit weve done. Especially considering all the broken glass around...
We both bought three foot bongs...going to race to see who can smoke a mile first.
I will no longer accept being cock blocked in my own bed.
I just let my hand run under cold water for five minutes. I couldn't stop staring at it and the only things I could think about were how amazing it felt, how cool water was, and what a wonderful world it is that we live in. Reasons why I don't smoke...
I send him pictures of my tits whenever I feel like he's paying too much attention to his girlfriend.
She crossed her eyes and threw up into a glass while sitting at the bar. It was fifty shades of sketchy dude.
Why is there a muffler in the livingroom?
First, I just want to say that I had nothing to do with it. Second, how good is your car insurance?
Yes... I'll kill two birds with one crazy ecstacy filled night.
They said you bought the guy a shot and was talking about being Greek and then all of the sudden just puked all in their pitcher of beer and got kicked out of the bar.
After we had sex he began to tell me the craziest places he's had sex. He told me KFC bathroom so I rolled over and went to sleep.
Only you would consider your best friend fucking your boyfriend to be a sign of everlasting friendship
How bad was it?
Stopped drinking Sunday, hungover on Tuesday bad.
did i just pee glitter
day drinking didnt prepare me for this..
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