dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
I am waking up at 7am to go to church with him and his family... I better get eaten out tonight.
The girl behind me in psych just tapped me on my shoulder to tell me there was a condom wrapper in my hood.
I just found the gloves and lightbulb I stole. Did you pee on a ATM inside a bank?
i had a long naked conversation with the cop on why is everything fun illegal
why is there a broken handcuff locked to the ceiling fan
One day, tell me please to stop buying shots when I'm overwhelmed. I might have just broken a tooth
If he can forgive your lousy blowjobs, you can ignore his terrible driving.
Someone sharpied "COCK HUNGRY" on my butt cheeks last night. When the fuck did I have my ass out?
If your gig isn't over in 30 minutes I am coming on that stage to come on your dick.
But I thought it was so funny last night
You also thought you were a gypsy mermaid last night
Go shave, and then go fuck the man
YOU ARE SO CRUDE, I LOVE YOU
He agreed to matching Christmas pajamas today, no guy does that for a girl he’s not seriously considering marrying.
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