So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
oh and i really hope miley falls off this mountain she is climbing
I'm just sayin. Is it sad that I spent my last dollar on a hamburger just to get a paper bag to huff out of?
the can pyramid on my head actually reached a decent height before I moved.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She started crying. I don't think she's gotten head from a sax player before.
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend. I woke up at 7 this morning to drive your mistake home because you wouldn't get up.
I have so many hands. So. Many. Hands. I can feel arms that I don't have yet. They tickle. I can see the blood in my eyes. I think something is happening. The hands!!! I'm ticking myself with hands I don't have yet! I can't stop giggling about my notyet hands!
I was just told that i'm a premature cuddler. . . What does that even mean?
Whatever it is you failed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Who the fuck did i sell my right shoe to last night i need to get that back im not walking with one shoe on
I have cobwebs on my vagina for halloween. And bats fly out when I open my legs.
I'm running on 2 hours of sleep. Just spent 6 minutes staring at the back of my hand thinking: "I don't really know this that well"
I put his pb&j sandwich in my bra and never looked back
Note to self, the correct response when a guy tells you he likes you as a person is not "ew"
She woke up, peed in the sink and then passed out again, it's only 2 in the afternoon
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