I am currently prioritizing my hw by splitting into things i can and things i cant do drunk. Oh college
There is an old man sitting across from me. Phone rang and his ringtone is children giggling, I'm not safe here.
Do you ever wonder how many people have prayed for you to be a better person?
Actually considered writing down one of the numbers on the bathroom stall. That's how much I miss vagina.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I dont think a "sorry ive slept with most of your teammates" text will do much
There is an alarming amount of urine in here.
There's a website where you can order a pile of horse shit to be dropped on a persons doorstep. So that's another option.
Welp... sober this am and I still have a parrot.
he was spending his time trying to use emojis to court a 19 year old, I can’t really take that seriously no matter how hot a dude is
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Found this cake smashed up inside a box on the sidewalk. Im saying yes to adventure and eating some.
Taking a nap. Sidewalk cake kicked my ass. It had boston creme filling!
the police dropped me off. that's how my night went.
dude, totally just walked home...using pizza as gloves
I got home and found him passed out in my tank top so i think i'll put lipstick on him and mass text a picture to everyone in his phone. that's what he gets for eating all my wheat thins
all I remember is screming at her "I want you and your tortillas... DEAD"
My vagina knows your penis is sad about Andrew Luck. You should come over and let her comfort him in his time of need
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