He wanted to take me out and said we could "go huntin in the woods."
I'm drinking a margarita out of my 'best bj' trophy and it tastes like victory.
It just hit me that I woke up to you in a bear suit. Explain.
I don't even want to talk about it, I'm traumatized. Even the dog knew to take advantage of the most intoxicated girl at the party...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
"Home for the holidays" isn't clearance to fuck the recently 18 year old high schooler right?
Nope, his last birthday was.
I'm eating Doritos that I crushed up n put in a cup so I only have to chill minimally.
Don't linger or you will get sucked into spending the night. Remember the mission mantra: GET OFF
Wait is it okay if I still want to fuck the whole USA swim team or is that only acceptable during the Olympics?
He just stared me dead in the eye as he continued to beat off. Then said "you were going to catch me sooner or later".
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
dont eat that thats our sex nutella.
god, I have more takeout restaurants in my contacts than friends
So, I have realized that I am kryptonite for married men. I'm not sure how to feel about this sober, but drunk me accepts her destiny.
Damn you. I'm in a bar with Southern Jesus Fearing Blah Blah Rednecks WHO ARE PROBABLY VOTING FOR TRUMP and you go radio silent.
How is it possible for someone who gets so many dick picks sent to her, to be experiencing such a complete and utter lack of dick IRL.
I got kicked out of the E.R. for saying "balls".
Randomize