Blackout barefoot maybe pregnant
Just got blue box Mac and cheese things are looking up
Black out sex on the trampoline? yes please.
There's a transgender game of twister in the basement...God doesnt want me to type this paper.
she added emergen-c to the bong-water bro, brilliant.
Dating After Heartbreak
Babe when I told you that you needed to grow up I didn't mean get drunk and sponsor 8 African kids.
Besides asking our teacher if he enjoyed being fisted did I have any other tragic moments last night?
From now on I forbid you to refer to it as a "bed". From now on you must only use the phrase "sex wagon".
Oh. My. God. You texted my mom "IM BACK BITCHES!"
You know you were way drunk when you wake up at 7 AM halfway on a couch, tangled in a sheet with your shoes still on.
These Images Prove Chrissy Teigen is the Funniest Model Alive
I haven't seen her in probably 3 months and when she showed up wasted to my house she promptly pulled out her tit
You're breaking my sexual little heart
We got drunk, we had raw sex and we discussed about the showrunner change in Doctor Who, in that order.
New fact of life: getting Becca high never helps any situation at all ever.
I DO have hobbies! I drink. I drink more. I catfish men on Grindr with photos of guys who are less attractive than me. I listen to Lovecraftian podcasts. I'm very well-rounded.
I fucking hate them. They came over and sat on me and made out. On top of me. Who the fuck does that?