I'm eating all of the evidence.
can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
I am drinking with my family and the average drinking tolerance is a shot and a half. I feel like the incredible hulk.
i sleep in a fine layer of vodka and semen. i don't know that that would appropriate for a pajama rally.
21 Of The Most Impressive Things Ever Seen In Porn
Still workable. Pretty sure i told her i'd eat her out in the woods.
Sorry you had to hear me puke. I didn't know I called you. Was it graceful?
I hope no one judges me for becoming a facebook fan of "Adderall" at 5:49 AM...
officially spring now- first drug bust of the season across the street.
nothing like walking down the street with a garbage bag of puke trying to find a dumpster
19 Parents Had Epic Reactions When Catching Their Kids Being “Bad”
We couldn't find him for like 4 hours. Turns out he was sitting under a tree and had thrown his phone in a lake because he couldn't figure out how to unlock it. Freshmen.
Just saw you drinking out of a flask on national tv. I've never been more proud of you
May or may not have been going down the road shooting fireworks.
My liver is whispering mean things about me to my kidneys. It's a fucking miracle I'm not hungover. Lol
...Just this whole adulting thing gets in the way of mermaid drag shows at lesbian bars.
I can feel your judgement through the phone