i know we just met, but i forget your name, and i'm wondering why my penis burns?
she said i have a nice penis, i told her only bob saget and god could judge that.
He told me he looked up all the foods that make cum taste better and he put it all on his moms shopping list. she came through my line. this ones a keeper I think.
First order of business is dropping my 9 am gym class. I'm sweating pure vodka.
i told her that i loved her pillow breasts and then she asked me if i wanted to motor boat them. so yea, i do need the room tonite.
So currently I have a block of cheese duct taped to my air conditioner in lieu of a fridge.
the bartender cut u off when u asked him for his screename so u could IM him later
Just hooked up on shake weight girl's dad's porsche. What are YOU doing with your life?
Yes, she did suck your dick in the bathroom to wake you up.
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
The fact that I bookended my summer with pregnancy scares doesn't upset me. The fact that he's a trombone major does...
Gonna be late for work. Sex comes first. Priorities.
Looks like a sea otter shaved my vagina. Keep an eye out for me this weekend, no one can see this.
it was weird i started the party in just my underwear and woke up in my clothes
He cut off part of his middle finger playing the knife game while singing The Knife Game Song at the top of his lungs. He also scream like a girl when his finger hit the floor and he realized he fucked up.
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