he kind of looks like leonardo dicaprio...in whats eating gilbert grape
wtf, did you fuck a retard?!
The hot Japanese girl in my class just said her "favorite sexy American actor is Nick Cage." That, I can work with.
I'm stoned and have been watching so many cartoons that I changed the channel and real people were on, and it scared me
He was carrying a rolled up carpet saying he was saving it for tomorrow's Walk of Fame.
These 23 People Walked In On Someone And Saw Some Crazy Sh*t
just found gum connecting my sunglasses to my floor board. you don't want to know where else it was.
you came here, splled a bunch of margaritas, hung up a picture of yourself and then left
Hes screaming about Slender man. whatever hes on is probably not healthy.
Yeah. You can ask him out. We're just fuck buddies. My vagina will be sad but your heart can be happy.
We stared down the barrel of pure insanity, took more and the electric elephant god rewarded our fearlessness by giving me golden skulls and naked women crawling out of the walls. I love acid
Confessions From 23 People Who Have Been Hiding Terrible Secrets
I was having the most awesome dream about onion rings and you hit me and told me to stop touching you...WTF?
Chipotle. Because when you've had diarrhea for 6 days why not just make it 7
Not every day do you see a hooker getting arrested at noon. Just kidding, we live in Reno.
Yeeeaahhh, I'm in no rush to dismiss a level 6 booty-call that pays my bar tabs and understands my Harry Potter obsession.
I'm sitting on your porch drinking wine from the bottle. Just so your new neighbors know what kind of people are in the neighborhood
I'm sorry I lead life with my vagina.