Can you return condoms to CVS?
Only if you return your pride as well.
and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
Yeah, that's not really a good thing. Especially for a girl. You should get a tattoo on your stomach that says "Please wear a condom".
Professor took us out for drinks. She said if I ordered the 64oz "Call a Cab," she'd give me an A. I drank it in 5 minutes. A+?
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He told me the hand job I gave him this morning was "lovely".
You better wipe the dick of your lips before you come smoke this blunt.
Yes, he did use his cock to direct traffic from my 3rd story window. That's why I love him
I fucking love my neighbors. I offered him chocolate and somehow it turned into a sexual proposition.
I think he's hit rock bottom. You know it's a low point in life when you cry because you weren't invited to sit in a box car and watch porn with two other straight dudes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my paper on vitamins just turned into a 2 hour tangent google search on what i should buy to best cure a hangover. I need to stop getting high before homework
the police report says i screamed sanctuary from a jungle gym at the playground when they caught up with us, obviously they disregarded international law.
Worse. He's Mormon. At least a gay guy will go get drinks with me.
he came over last night and we fucked with the great british baking show on in the background. it was beautiful
I'm naked and there are two trees and a yield sign
Be right there
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
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