Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
Dude I got a text from you at 1:30 last night and you didn't use any vowels
Haha, I didn't want to buy any... we're in a recession you know
I just did something awful... i just had to tell someone... i just used my brothers electric face cleaner as a vibrator
Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
I just saw a girl walking home wearing a tshirt, boxers, and cowboy boots. Thanks for having the decency to drive me to my car.
make sure i look cute passed out on the couch.
I may have been to starbucks and 2 classes with balls still written on my face...
One of the cleaning ladies on my floor just screamed from the bathroom
with your flexibility, and the size of my penis, amazing things are possible.
I thought stuff was gonna go really bad after he filled the super-soaker with kerosene. but it all turned out pretty well.
College: when you wake up drunk without pants and wearing a Cosby sweater
I just used my VA prescription bottle of xanax to get a military discount at the liquor store. I win.
Only you could get away with that.
Blacked in cold and wet, with them areound me singing Aaaaall we are saaaaayiiiing is YOU PEED YOUR PANTS
I'll tell you that it involved a pair of pliers and a trip to the ER.
I demand a full explanation right now.
I put on a tiger onsie to initiate sex... It worked