I found the seven page love letter I had written you. I'm sorry i was so obsessed.
Boobs. All I remember is boobs.
omg. why did you never tell me how amazing shitting and smoking is?
i thought this knowledge was automatically promulgated at the age of eighteen?
my grandma just told me that size does matter, and don't let anyone tell you anything different.
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
It's not mothers day until you're vomitting syrup into grandma's toilet. Cherish the holidays
what the fuck a piece of candy corn just came out of her nose
Nothing like banging your nurse in the shower while staying in the hospital
Literally just had a girl put her street name into my phone. Yeah.
I think there's a problem with society when I'm shopping for lingerie and I think "man some of these would make kickass shirts"
Rigtt?!
What do you take me for? I'm not trying to lure you into bed with stories of my dead aunt.
WE HAVE TO LEAVE. I HAVE HAD SEX WITH WAY TOO MANY PEOPLE IN THIS BUS STATION.
How's Vegas?
Woke up with a sculpture of my own head. Been trying to find Ashley for two days. so pretty not too bad.
The cop told you he couldn't let you pee. You just pulled your pants down and squared anyway and im surprised you didnt get arrested.No more drinking for you.
ok morning sex is a totally valid reason to come in late... ur good, cya in 20
Randomize