my roommate just said, "don't look at it, just put it iin your mouth"
she said she could "feel the heat of my groin" against her. ruined the whole fucking moment.
I still havent given him the valentines day card i got him. I feel like just writting...."sorry for the horrible blow job i gave u last night." and just giving it to him.
i just got painted green i'm not about to leave for anything
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you want the something i can tell my mom in ten year version or the you're gonna call me a whore but be proud version?
I'm actually not sure I need to run today, between the crazy monkey sex and breaking into my own house.
She wants me to spank her and yell "Kerry! Your father is disappointed with your choices!" Fuck up but crazy hot? Or just fuck up crazy?
So I guess I bought a cat last night. Fuuuccckkk.
You have all semester to unpack your car, quarter jello shots only last until 10.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
Today I learned that when you lick a mans butthole, you get wined and dined at a nice french restaurant.
I got with a bridesmaid and a server as well as put an $80 tab in rum and coke under the name Emerson Iglesias. Are you sure it wasn't my wedding?
The UTI came back with a vengeance.
He called out my ex's name during sex.
Alex is a pretty common unisex name.
It was the same Alex. I asked.
I looked into her soul, didn't I?
You eye-fucked her soul.
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