After you pregamed and were plastered you saw the cop was parked illegally so you gave him a citizens arrest
So I'm at planned parenthood and there are 5 people here from Friday's party.
I wore a leash I'll tell you about it later I had a fantastic time
I thought stuff was gonna go really bad after he filled the super-soaker with kerosene. but it all turned out pretty well.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
IDK who she called, but some guy came into the party, flying drop kicked Joe said never again. She has to invite him around again.
So if you ever need to know a guy who knows a guy who knows a guy that can put a 24oz beer can up his ass... Hit me up...
I'm just planning on experiencing Disney as adult style as it gets. Drinking bloody mary's at dawn and telling all the kids waiting in lines how badly their future sucks and that Santa isn't real.
I was giving this guy head and he stopped me to look me in the eyes and say "you have a gift"
Literally too hungover to pull out of the driveway. Tried 3 times and failed. I'm going back to bed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have to shave my legs first. I'm afraid tiny woodland creatures will fly out if he tries touches them.
im watching blue is the warmest color at the music box and this dude is literally masturbating 3 feet in front of me
I just have to decide what I love more, food or dick.
YOUR TO-DO SEX LIST CANNOT CONSIST ENTIRELY OF MY THREE BEST FRIENDS
and their significant others
AND THEIR SIGNIFICANT OTHERS
I feel like a grown up and it scares me so I'm hiding out in the bathroom stall and messaging you
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
Randomize