You know how I know he's a virgin? He's wearing transition lenses.
I wish life had little blips of pornography
I wish all the girls i wanted to sleep with knew how big my dick was then id have a better chance
my dog ran away and came back with a marajuana plant. what are you doing tonight?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He kissed my cheek and I could smell it the whole way home like shit
Two people in the coffee shop I'm at are on a date and talking about how acid has affected them and the girl just mentioned meth. Fuck studying, this just got interesting.
260 beers this month. I need a new hobby.
Well someone has to be the Christmas slut at the family dinner. I suppose it's my year to fill those shoes.
Can we please stop calling your vagina the cave of wonders?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
she's a dental assistant. she can get nitrous. kinda looks like a sloppy bucket of fuck. time to take one for the team. NEED SHOTS STAT!!
well his nickname is liver of steel so it makes sense that his balls follow suit. tell him i say sorry
attractive or not, he has more than one book on serial killers. i'm gonna get out of here while i can
I am playing a little game I like to call "How Quickly Can I Infuse This Vodka Into My Bloodstream Without the Use of an IV"
You don't understand. My ass is the color of eggplant.
You just wait. When you see me foam roll naked, you're going to lose your mind.
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