Wow, being the totally hot and slutty looking 30 year old lady on the dance floor does NOT necessarily mean that she has skills in bed.
Quiet hours sex sucks. I hate finals.
She answered the door wearing a blanket and holding a golf club. I was too late for this party.
Also, you peed on your hand last night. Id just like to point that out
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is that a tongue signal to get over there? That's how my two heads are taking it.
'Well you know, stuff happens' isn't really an excuse for sticking a cheeto in my ear
Please put me in a whole with no windows and never let me out.
I just want to fall into a pit of xannies and eat my way out.
They're frat boys at heart and have sickly, dusty, rotting souls.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Rough day
Good thing I've started drinking again
Currently rolling a blunt in the bathroom of Planned Parenthood
You ran full speed into the glass door with your Patron and yelled "FEEL THE RHYTHM, FEEL THE RHYME"
Hey I didn't mean to come across like I was judging you about your liberal sexual choices. I would like details of your threesome if you need to talk about it!
we got cockblocked by his mom again...its like she has a radar on me
please stop trying to sleep with him
I just put my eye make up on in the bathroom of the bar.... I may be too comfortable here....
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