I'm lost and stupid without you.
i'm starting to get pissed at how pandora is trying to force coldplay on me
update: the house isnt on fire anymore, but he is still pissing on all your stuff.
the house was on fire??
shit I thought I told you.
you're just mad because in the hogwarts world I'm Harry and you're Ron. get over it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Don't make me choose between a good grade and anal
woke up with a sweatshirt on that said "someone special calls me grandma" and a sword. i'm just going to assume that it was a good night
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
Apparently as I was doing the walk of shame home my dad's date was on her way to hers. hoes come in all ages these days
Just used the leftover candycorn for candycorn vodka. Our house is trying to continue the Halloween spirit for as long as possible.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Would you get mad if I held a "how many dick pics can you get in one night" competition with my friend?
Ah, drunk me ordered sushi at 3 a.m. for sober me's lunch the next day. EXCELLENT
Like woke up with a dick piercing kind of drunk.
Most tragic bathtub-fart of all time. I am going to be late.
We watched Purple Rain and then proceeded to have sex while listening to the album. If that's not exactly how Prince would want people to honor him, I don't know what is
holy shit the yoga instructor bought his baby pig to class today
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