even your uterus rejects him.
apparently my uterus is the smartest part of my body.
i just realized the only form of arm exercise i get is holding my arms up in the stand up tanning booth
repeat this after me. period at the beach is better than baby at the beach. breathe. and: period at the beach is better than baby at the beach.
So currently I have a block of cheese duct taped to my air conditioner in lieu of a fridge.
She passed out in the backyard, making "face down" snow angels ... so they could have a smile.
The last thing I remember is pushing my way into the bathroom and dumping a 40 on him. We havent talked since.
Found her. Shes unconscious up against the room door. Her credit card is in the keycard slot
That's unfortunate. Distance can be a stoner's greatest enemy.
You make it sound like a battle for Middle Earth.
Come out Saturday. It's for my lesbian daughter from the future birthday.
Just dodged a state trooper, your weed will be there shortly. Fear the unbustable!
I'm going to three dry weddings this month. I'm flashing three dry weddings this month
How much do souls cost? I feel like I need one if those.
You know the party's good when you say "Never have I ever caused an emergency landing" and someone drinks
We're making a scrapbook of dick pics, you want in or what?
Kind of like the new iOS 10 because I can send sexts with fireworks or confetti. Really gets the point across