Me. At least after what I've been through.
WHY CAN'T YOU EVER SHIT LIKE A NORMAL PERSON, JESSE.
i just used my scantron for my final to make paper shotglasses. i'd say i passed in flying colors.
he made me have a moment of silence for the half of my ice cream cone i threw away.
Fuckkkk i made out with a freshman.....but he's old for his age. THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOURE NOT AROUND.
oh my god i'm in a crawl space
Just got invited out of group to take shots after hearing her gay friend say "why would I give him my alcohol so you can suck his dick. It's going to be a good night
Like do you hear me I PUKED IN MY OWN HANDS AND HE STILL SAID I WAS GORGEOUS
Cause its not a drunken adventure unless someone ends up in a pool
Hot Italian guy literally came into my logic class just to get my number to study with me and left. America.
I bet he'd be real motivational during sex. And he'd probably make you call him superman.
You can't say "my boobs are wonderful" and not expect my drunken subconscious to focus on wanting to see them. Btw-can I see them?
also i don't know what you guys ate last night but he broke the toilet
As your friend, who loves and cares for you, I have to be honest. I am judging you so VERY hard right now. Sorry.
Yep. Just fucked a 34 year old on the football field where we both went to high school. That's a story for the grandkids.
Randomize
